Black Notes on White Pages

You make your move.
This black and white board is your playground.
You slide around, hopping from white to white.
And when I stand in your way you dance to black,
To find your way back to white,
Your innocence always in flight it seems frightened of me.

Once I stole your pawn
I stood on the ground that you had stood on
I wanted a glimpse of your king
Vulnerable and hidden
The one directing your moves
The one you seek to protect
But swiftly she slides - your queen - and with fury
My knight - awkward and angular - is burning
Check Mate.

I'd have preferred: "Let me check in with you mate"
But if I play your games
The ones you've practiced for lifetimes
Then my unpracticed play will never be your match,
Will never be your equal.

I'd have preferred if your queen
Was only there to pet the horse.
To befriend.
And know the knight is only armed
To keep my horses safe 
From you.

We close the board.
Good game you say - better luck next time.
But this game is not about luck, for you wrote the rules.
And there will be no next time, not this time.
Let's stop playing games.
Instead of swapping moves,
Let's swap stories.
Instead of separating ourselves from our pieces,
Let's separate from each other -
We're toxic together

Play, after all, was never about winning and losing
Play is about creating
So I'm joining my friends who play music
For they know the beauty of playing
Black notes on white pages.

__________________________

Chasing innocence is always a losing game for me. I'd like to learn to separate from the loudest voices within me for a while. To learn to listen to the beautiful, sad, and often painful music that echoes from my darkest pieces.